Separation Anxiety

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Morning prayer: Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts like David in Psalm 139 (23); help me to know that you are my shepherd and I shall not want for anything (Psalm 23). Help me to keep my mind stayed on you that I might not focus on my disappointments or the tests that were promised to come in this life (John 16:23). Help me to have YOUR peace which is perfect simply because I trust you (Isaiah 26:3). Your word has posed the question ‘what do we gain from all our worry’ (Ecclesiastes 2:22)? Nothing; I know. I will strive not to be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present my requests to you (Phillipians 4:6). So let it be.

As a parent, separation is hard to experience and observe. Like two pieces of Velcro being ripped apart, separation of mother from child, father from daughter, only son from family is loud and disruptive–if only in theory. Like Velcro whose design it was to hold things securely together, its power lies in its ability to come back together once taken apart. Even though the fine fibers between strips have been changed in the disruption, they are durable and intended to change a little bit every time.

The comfort (and perhaps the safety) in knowing that at one time I could control the interactions between us is now gone. He is miles away with only a plane ticket and time standing between us…no…there is more. New friends. New choices. Some I don’t want to know about. I have to trust that the years of “seasoning” lovingly used to dress his daily experiences have been enough to tenderize his life.

Family is the bridge that both separates and connects us…it is strong and will endure, anchored in love and weathered by change. I have learned to surrender control.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; 
courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time; enjoying one moment at a time; accepting hardships as the pathway to peace; taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it; trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His Will; that I may be reasonably happy in this life and supremely happy with Him forever in the next. 
Amen. (Reinhold Niebuhr (1892-1971)

 

About Dr. Joy

I am a life lover...I teach. I read. I write. I love. I pray. I eat. I dream.
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